Counselling takes place when a counsellor/helper sees a client/person in a private and confidential setting to explore a difficulty the client is having, distress they may be experiencing or perhaps their dissatisfaction with life, or loss of a sense of direction and purpose. It is always at the request of the client as no one can properly be 'sent' for counselling.
By listening attentively and patiently the counsellor/helper can begin to perceive the difficulties from the client's point of view and can assist them to see things more clearly, possibly from a different perspective. Counselling is a way of enabling choice or change or of reducing confusion. It does not involve giving advice or directing a client to take a particular course of action. Counsellors/helpers do not, and should never, judge or exploit their clients in any way.
In the counselling sessions the client can explore various aspects of their life and feelings, talking about them freely and openly in a way that is rarely possible with friends or family. Bottled up feelings such as anger, anxiety, grief and embarrassment can become very intense and counselling offers an opportunity to explore them, without negative judgement, and with the possibility of making them easier to understand. The counsellor/helper will gently encourage the expression of feelings and as a result of their training and experience, will be able to accept and reflect the client's problems without becoming burdened by them.
Acceptance and respect for the client are essentials for a counsellor/helper and, as the relationship develops, so too does trust between the counsellor and client, enabling the client to look at many aspects of their life, their relationships and themselves which they may not have considered or been able to face before. The counsellor/helper may help the client to examine in detail the behaviour or situations which are proving troublesome and to find an area where it would be possible to initiate some change as a start. The counsellor may help the client to look at the options open to them and help them to decide the best options for them.
Please feel free to view the ‘My experience’ page on this website regarding my personal counselling/helping background.
Please be aware that the treatment table that appears in the pictures is not used for counselling. The treatment room has very comfortable seating for this purpose. There is also another room currently being designed and modified especially for Counselling.
Just some of the issues counselling can help with;
Grief
Anxiety
Depression
Anger
Relationships
Alcoholism
Substance abuse
Addiction
Sexual problems
Low self esteem
Coping difficulties
Stress
Abuse
Self-harm
My counselling experience centres on CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy), Person Centred, Integrative Therapy & spiritual development. CBT is, arguably, the most researched, proven and common form of successful psychotherapy. It is designed as a short – medium term psychotherapy which aims to offer symptom relief ASAP. I am great believer in the holistic approach and therefore I don’t believe one glove fits all; so although I have presented a CBT overview below, as previously mentioned CBT is not the only therapeutic model I rely on to assist people.
CBT – An Overview
CBT is based on the premise that our interpretation of an event is crucial – for it determines how we will feel and react. Where beliefs and thought patterns are unrealistic and negative, this can lead to a variety of problems, and to the development of emotional disorders (such as depression, anxiety or phobias).
CBT aims to alleviate emotional distress through gently and empathetically confronting and challenging errors in thinking. It does this through identifying and exploring the way we view and interpret a particular experience or incident. CBT frames these in terms of misconceptions, faulty analyses, self-deception, distortions and personal blind spots. These errors in thinking are appraised and challenged, by testing their validity against objective reality. We can then assess ourselves and the world more realistically – for maladaptive thinking is often based on hypotheses, not facts.
In summary, CBT is founded on three main assumptions:
1. Feelings and behaviours are directly affected by the way a person thinks.
2. Negative and unrealistic patterns of thinking give rise to emotional disorders.
3. Altering negative, unrealistic thought patterns can reduce emotional disturbance or distress.
In Summary
Cognitive behavioural therapy is a collaborative (between client and counsellor), skills-based model. It aims at teaching the necessary skills for identifying and modifying maladaptive thoughts and beliefs. (Distorted thinking and maladaptive thoughts and beliefs are changeable things that everyone has to a lesser or greater degree). The client is actively engaged with the therapist, working towards an agreed end or goal. CBT includes the following processes:
• Establishing whether the client truly wishes to change – for there can be benefits to suffering emotional upset or disturbance (others may expect and require less o them, they may be given a lot of attention and sympathy, they may be relieved of many of the responsibilities of everyday living…and so on)
• Understanding the connection between thoughts, feelings and behaviour.
• Teaching the client how to identify & monitor their negative thoughts & feelings, & the environments or events that trigger these responses.
• Teaching the client how to modify their thinking, (including reality testing the evidence behind maladaptive beliefs to see if they are truly valid & realistic)
• Helping the client to actively substitute realistic & adaptive thoughts & beliefs.
• Encouraging the client to consistently challenge maladaptive thought patterns & persistently behave in ways that contradict their old beliefs.
As Epictetus, the first century philosopher, proclaimed:
“Men are disturbed not by things but by the views which they take of them.”
******************************************
